View From My Window

Tuesday, March 2, 2021 — Upward and onward… I’ve been unpacking the boxes of stuff that had been stored in the two upright cabinets in the laundry room. I packed the boxes a couple of days before the flooring remodel, so if I were to think about purging (seriously), I know I could possibly jettison a lot of the stuff that I kept and just let it go. I still might do just that. Tammy was here for 3 hours today, and I had her cleaning upstairs and downstairs. She says I am her only client. I smiled and said, “I can keep you busy!” So I’ve asked her to come back next Tuesday for another 3 hours. In unpacking the boxes, I decided what I would have her do–help me purge this house! It’s going to be wonderful!

Yesterday was a really eventful day. Robert drove his truck over to the repair shop so it could be smog tested for the registration renewal. I followed in the Honda in case they needed to keep the truck. After the testing (it passed on the first go round, thankfully), I paid the bill and told Robert I would see him back at the house. I was hungry so began fixing lunch as soon as I got home. Robert arrived about 15 min. later and was exhausted. At 6:15 p.m., I was at the computer and he came in and said he was tired and was going to bed. We discussed what had transpired that day that would have made him so tired and the only thing we could come up with was his driving his truck. The stress and anxiety took a lot out of him. I told him that pretty much put an end to any driving. He finally went to bed at 8:00 p.m. after deliberating on whether to take a shower or not. He did take a shower — I doubted he could sleep if he didn’t, but he forgot to take his evening pills and I didn’t question him so when I checked his pill box this morning, there sat his pills from last night. I really need to be better at keeping on top of his pills. He sometimes takes the pills from the wrong day/cup in the medicine box. When I went to refill his pill box this morning, I noticed that the morning pills from yesterday were there, yet I know for a fact he took his pills yesterday morning. That means he took the morning pills from another day. <sigh> Notwithstanding his severe fatigue, his ability to come up with words is becoming increasingly noticeable, and frustrating for him.

This afternoon I got my things ready for the post office and told him I needed to go to the credit union as well as the post office. He replied with his usual comment, “Why?” He really doesn’t want me anywhere but here at the house with him. I told him because I had to mail a birthday package and I needed to get $2 bills for the youngest grandson’s birthday card. He turns 15 this year so that meant I needed 16-$2 bills (one for each year of his birth and another to grow on). Karma was with me when I went to the credit union and the teller was able to go to their vault and pull out a stack of 100-$2 bills! I was all set to face the horrendous task of hitting every bank in Tehachapi, acquiring the $2 bills one or two at a time. (I had to do it this way a couple of years ago and vowed to save them through the year instead, which I did this time, but I only had 5 collected. They really are scarce.) Anyway, everyone’s birthday is taken care of until later in the year. (Though my great-niece is due to deliver her baby on the 20th of April — the day before my birthday!) I need to make a quilt for the little one.

Speaking of quilts, I have one in the makings — all the blocks are cut out and ready to be put together. When I get the top done, I’m going to take it in to the quilt shop and pick out the backing fabric and pay to have it put together. No more stressing over getting it quilted. I like doing the binding — I sit at night and stitch the binding down by hand while watching t.v. It’s a very enjoyable task for me.

I ordered a set of prayer flags from Amazon. Years ago, I would receive a set of paper prayer flags from the Save Tibet foundation, but somehow I got off their list so haven’t received any in years. One of my bloggers (Stuff from Ellen’s Head) wrote about hanging prayer flags and it reminded me that I haven’t had any for some time. I immediately set about searching for a nice set. I found a set of flags on “Hands Of Tibet Handmade Tibetan Affirmation Prayer Flags Happiness Courage Love Tranquility Wisdom. Each String has six vibrantly Colored Flags and Handmade.”

There were hundreds of other flag choices, but this particular set spoke to me, reminding me of the need to remain strong and positive while weathering this life of caregiving to a loved one with dementia. Robert just rolled his eyes when he saw me hanging them from the railing of the deck. He tolerates my love of the metaphysical side of life. I told him seeing them made me feel calm, and they do. And when these are tattered and taken by the winds, I will order a new set, and I am resolved to always have prayer flags hanging from our deck so all I need to do to lift my mood is to look out my window.

Blessings to all. Be safe, take care and be good to yourself. You are loved and you are needed. Be sure to tell those you love that you love them.

About tehachap

Happily married and retired, my hobbies are quilting, reading and anything to do with trains (watching, photographing and running them in our G scale garden railroad). My husband and I have truly enjoyed our retirement, and have fulfilled one of our primary goals in life and that is to own a home overlooking train tracks so we can watch trains 24/7. We are sincerely blessed in this life.
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14 Responses to View From My Window

  1. Karen says:

    I put my husband’s pills in a dark colored small dish every morning and night. He takes them with breakfast and at bedtime. I can see easily if he has taken them. I fill the pill boxes and keep them away from him. He was happy to be relieved of that job. One more for me and one less for him😟

    Liked by 2 people

    • tehachap says:

      Thanks for this. You know, I put my daily pill allotment into a small dish but my husband takes his out of his pill box that sits on the counter by his place mat. I think I’ll begin using a dish for his pills too. Good call! Thanks… Carol p.s. Do you have a blog? Does your husband have Alzheimer’s? If yes, when was he diagnosed? Thanks for your input. It’s greatly appreciated.

      Liked by 1 person

    • tehachap says:

      Just re-read your comment and am wondering if this would work for my husband since he doesn’t remember what each pill looks like nor when he’s supposed to take a particular medication. I would have to set his morning pills out at night and then once he’s taken those, replace the morning pills with his evening pills. :/ It might be better to just tell myself to check his pill box when I’ve taken MY pills in the morning and to check it again before he goes to bed at night. For instance, tonight I did remember to ask him and he hadn’t taken his evening meds, so he took them and then went to bed. I’ll just have to get better at monitoring him. Thanks…

      Liked by 1 person

  2. cacjjc says:

    Hi Carol,

    As always, I enjoy reading your blog. The fatigue that Robert is experiencing….well, I remember it so well when my husband was still alive. I had a hard time understanding how he could be so fatigued after such little effort. Some wise person explained to me that with dementia, when things are confusing for folks, it takes so much psychic energy to get through/figure out the task at hand, that it absolutely exhausts them. It would be like you or I sitting down to take a chemistry exam for which we were not prepared, but felt pressure to do our very best. After all our effort over a couple of hours, we would be exhausted from the stress and the anxiety of trying to do our very best.

    Dementia is such a cruel disease, both for the person suffering and for the caregiver as well. There is a new movie called Supernova starring Stanley Tucci and Colin Firth that is streaming on Amazon. In the movie, Tucci has Alzheimer’s. It is a very moving, heartwarming film.


    Liked by 4 people

    • tehachap says:

      Hello stranger!!! Thank you so much for your input. I wondered if it wasn’t the stress of trying to drive after not driving at all for so long. I was relieved that he made it home safely, but knew the phone would ring if he’d got into an accident at all. I want to get rid of the truck, but it’s HIS truck and I don’t want to take that away from him, even if he can’t drive it. We can afford to have it just sit there, and I guess that’s what will happen from now on. Next year when the tags are due, I might consider doing a non-op on it, but won’t do that if he’s still cognizant. Utterly unreal at times… Hugs and much love to you.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh boy, I remember this pill-taking dilemma/progression. Now that he might be taking pills from a different day or time slot, probably it’s time for a single cup which you fill and monitor so there’s less chance of confusion. We had a “write it down when you take it” system for a while, like a checklist, until J said one day, “I remembered to write it down, but did I take it??” So much for that system!
    Also, if you haven’t already, maybe move your pill container out of range so he is less likely to take something from that, in his confusion.
    Love the prayer flag idea – anything that helps you feel calm and lifts the mood is wonderful!

    Liked by 2 people

  4. dkzody says:

    My wind chimes are like your prayer flags. They bring a sense of peace, calm, and normalcy. Every morning, when I take the squirrel/bird food out back, I ring the chimes that hang from the tree. A former student gave me a small wind chime at Christmas and I keep it in the guest room and ring it any time I go in there. The sound just fills me with joy and hope. As I’m sure your prayer flags do for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • tehachap says:

      Our winds are much too strong for wind chimes–we’ve tried it several times. I have chimes hanging in my office — they hang from my ceiling fan/light fixture. I also have a set of chimes and a cup strand (from Ecuadore) hanging by my sewing machine. I’ll have to photograph them and share them.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Ellen Abbott says:

    that’s a nice set of prayer flags and thanks for the mention. I have to take pills twice a day and I would forget so I did two things. I set an alarm on my phone for 9 AM and 9 PM (my chosen pill taking times) and every morning I put the days allotment in a small dish so on my way to bed I can easily see if I took them all. even with the alarm sometimes I forget.

    Liked by 2 people

    • tehachap says:

      Ah…. excellent idea because I DO forget to ask him if he remembered! It’s like the blind leading the blind at times around here. I am blessed to have people who not only care enough to take the time to read my drivel, but to also leave notes of support. Hugs to you…


  6. mageb says:

    As of today, I take four more pills morning and night. The side effects seem very dementiaish to me. Now thanks for your caring, I am off to sew another branch.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Joanne Noragon says:

    I have a pill regimen, morning and night. I recently added another pill at breakfast and supper. I put them in a separate dish at the table. The only advantage is I can see if I missed on if there is a pill in the dish come morning. Getting old isn’t easy for anyone, including those who meter out the doses.

    Liked by 1 person

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