View From My Window

Wednesday, November 17, 2021 — I received an e-mail update from a fellow caregiver whose husband has MCI (Mild Cognitive Impairment). He went in for a checkup recently and his diagnosis was changed to that of Mild Alzheimer’s. She went on to describe some of the symptoms in the progression of his disease. As I read the symptoms, I recognized several that Robert had been exhibiting but I hadn’t connected the dots. Yet another caregiver who blogs says that the first time something odd happens with her husband, it shocks her and she doesn’t know what to do or say in response to the situation. The next time the same thing happens, she isn’t as shocked and has come up with an appropriate response. Then the next time, it doesn’t bother her at all — it’s just part of the new ‘norm.’

So many times, we see things, but we don’t really SEE them as being different or unusual until someone else mentions the same situations/symptoms. 1. Robert hates to talk on the phone now, even to his sons, but especially to his brother who is very talkative (and he asks why people want to come to the house to visit); 2. He forgets where I am but doesn’t call me on the phone because he can no longer dial the number; 3. He’s more passive than ever before, reluctant to leave the house unless it’s to take a ride somewhere he wants to go (i.e., Wendy’s for a frosty). I saw these changes, but didn’t look at them as part of his Alzheimer’s. I think I just attributed it to the COVID situation and his reluctance to get out in public among people who might not be vaccinated.

He was diagnosed six years ago and he has episodes now that are stark reminders to him that his mind no longer functions the way it used to. Recently, during one of these spells he asked me how other people handled living with Alzheimer’s. I told him I didn’t know but I did know that every one is different and the disease is progressive. I told him I was glad his progression had been slow, and that no matter what happened, I would always be there to help him through it. I wish there was more I could do. I wish our lives were different, but it is what it is and acceptance makes life easier on everyone.

Be safe and take care of yourself. Be grateful for the life you have–it can change so quickly. Be sure to tell those you love that you love them.

About tehachap

Happily married and retired, my hobbies are quilting, reading and anything to do with trains (watching, photographing and running them in our G scale garden railroad). My husband and I have truly enjoyed our retirement, and have fulfilled one of our primary goals in life and that is to own a home overlooking train tracks so we can watch trains 24/7. We are sincerely blessed in this life.
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11 Responses to View From My Window

  1. Karen says:

    My husband also now asks why our friends stand talking to us in the yard when they are going for a walk. He now gets bored and says he is going in the house and he leaves. He has also had trouble with his phone so it is out of his sight. In another month I will probably cancel it. I have to say it takes longer than three times for me to feel that something is the new norm but I am working on it. On Facebook there is a site called “Oh Hello Alzheimer’s “ and it is good.

    Liked by 1 person

    • tehachap says:

      Thank you for that resource–as you know, we need all the help we can get! And that’s another reason I write and put down my thoughts here. When I share with others what’s going on in my life, we all learn, and we all share the burden that life puts on us at times. Blessings to you and your husband. BTW, how is his stamina/physical balance?


    • tehachap says:

      Just wanted to thank you for telling me about “Oh, hello Alzheimer’s”. Great site and good information! Just learned about another potential medication!!


  2. Thinking of you, Carol, and sending you hope for patience as you deal with these changes.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. dkzody says:

    Yes, keep writing. Keep putting your feelings out there. We hear you. You matter. Robert matters. Share his life with us. It will make a difference in the lives of all of us.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. mageb says:

    I would love it if you would write a bit about Robert’s life. I too am here for you every day. And too, I really appreciate having you in my life. Long distance hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. 67andgood says:

    I’m so glad you are trying to keep up on all the meds and other coping skills. I am sure it is exciting when you can find a source of help.

    Liked by 1 person

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